book run 2010

i didn't get to run as much as i should have last year, so i'm making it my new year's resolution to join the fun runs at BGC almost every week. mixing work and working out... and it's fun. (they don't call them fun runs for nothing. ha. )

i don't have any specific goal when i run. but this morning, i was halfway through the first km of my 5km when i decided that my goal was to run till my legs feel like they're going to fall off and until my chest feels like it's going to explode. 2 Kms later, i decided that was not the brightest idea and slowed my pace and walked. then my boss pointed to M R, one of the most beautiful local celebrities, running a few feet ahead of us. after walking and staring at her shapely hips for five minutes, i decided i had a new goal: beat M R at the finish line. and i did.

runningmate sent the race results 30 minutes ago via text. it's my best time so far. it's my best time but it's still embarrassing so i'm not posting it here.

oh, and i did get that picture with D D. which, i failed to admit earlier, was my real goal for joining this race. haha.

next run : condura run for the dolphins. can't wait.

sweet dreams

while i argue in my mind whether i should do some stuff for work or finish some personal errands or just sit back and read a book on this sunday night, i thought i should drop by this blog.

last year, a former colleague gave me a small notepad for christmas. there was a quote at the bottom of the paper. it said, "If one advances carefully in the direction of his dreams, & endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with success unexpected in uncommon hours. " ~ Henry David Thoreau

i took one piece from that notepad and kept it in my wallet since. and soon after i started looking for a job that i liked. four months later, i got a new job and wondered how the hell i got it.

lately i have been thinking a lot about work... and the monetary compensation i get from this job that i love so much. it's not that what i get isn't enough... it's just that i know i can get so much more from a job that's easier. easier but something i'm only mildly interested in. just thinking about this stresses me out.

it's like this... i love my job. i can't imagine myself doing anything else. but my salary is just enough to get me through. it's not enough to get me that beautiful house or that new car or those amazing vacations. but everyday i'm thankful that i get to do something that makes sense to me.

which brings me to an important question, would you rather have a job that'll enable you to get that beautiful house, that new car and those amazing vacations... or would you rather do something you love. everyday. a job that makes you smile. and feel blessed that you are doing what you love. yet it'll take a lot of sacrifice and time to get a nice house, a decent car and the occasional vacation.

i think the question here is, what's more important to me?

well... look at the time! it's almost 10pm... time for bed. sweet dreams.

NP : clockwatching : jason mraz
Let's live in this moment just this time, could we?
Just take one moment of our time m-m-m-m-maybe.
Let's forget we running out of time.

I'm off like an airplane,
I'm catching my second wind again.
I'm using my left brain
And I'm righting all my wrongs.
lately we're running out of time, aren't we?

couch wars

before i make any big (or sometimes even small) decisions, i always do my research. well... almost. i should have on this one. Because the first thing that comes up when you google "choosing a room mate/flat mate" is, "never room with a friend". i want to bitch slap myself for not researching this major decision in my life. another lesson learned.

there's a reason why we tirelessly looked for a two bedroom apartment for months. so that we can both have our own rooms. and here are the reasons why we both have to have our own rooms:

- so that none of us will have to tip toe if we want to use the kitchen in the middle of the night/day.
- so that one of us can watch tv without lowering the volume while the other one is asleep.
- so that neither will have to deal with the other person's personal stuff/clutter.
- so that neither one of us will have to watch the other sleep, dress up, put her make up on.

so when my room mate refuses to sleep in her bedroom, my frustration is understandable. right? do you even know anyone who sleeps in the living room??? that's crazy. especially when there's an available bedroom in the house. and i wouldn't write about it here if it hadn't reached this point where i am just ready to change the locks and put all her stuff on the corridor.

it's been three months since we moved in this condo. i let her sleep in the living room the first month because i thought it was a temporary thing... a few weeks, max. but it has been three f#c%ing months. She sleeps in the living room because she's scared... of ghosts, of evil spirits, etc. which is childish and stupid. I try to be understanding... so I gave her until January. When January came, I called a cleaning lady to clean her bedroom and the rest of the house (since she doesn't do housework either). So, what does she do? She sleeps on the couch.

We have different schedules. When she's asleep, I'm awake, and vise versa. So when she sleeps in the living room, i have no choice but to watch tv and sit on the floor, or sit on a really uncomfortable chair and strain my ears to hear what i'm watching. or i can lie in bed and sleep all day.

and besides that.... it's very uncomfortable to do any activity while someone in the room is asleep. that's just how i am. i think that's how most people are.

i'm not saying that i'm the perfect room mate. i probably have a lot of annoying habits... and i do have a dog who poops and pees in the living room and kitchen as she pleases. but i have given up a lot of things i love and there are certain things i can't take... like my tv turned on even when no one is watching. (i am not ready to buy a new tv anytime soon, and the next one i buy will be in my bedroom). know what i hate more than dirty dishes and a cluttered table? a person sleeping in the living room with the dirty dishes and the cluttered table.

please tell me i'm not being unreasonable because i'm way in over my head.

such unnecessary inconvenience.

heart's desires and answered prayers

"when it hurts, when it means you rub chins with death, or even if it means dying, that's good. Anything that moves ahead, wins. No chess game was ever won by the player who sat for a lifetime thinking over his next move."

~ farewell summer : ray bradbury

i know i haven't written much in the past year. (i'm blaming my job for that. ) so in a nutshell, here's a random summary of my facebook statuses for 2009.



i think this about sums up my year. it's so funny that bad ass in 09 would be the first one on the list. or that it was even included. haha.

it was a year of blessings. of family. of hope. and everything falling into place. well... almost. i am, after all, a work in progress.

i have been so blessed... so blessed that sometimes, i feel that if i asked for anything more, even God would raise an eyebrow. haha.

one might say that 2009 was my year. but, know what? the best is yet to come. saying that 2009 was my year is like saying that the years to come will not be able to measure up and everything is just downhill from here. but this is just the beginning. it's my turn now.

it's so easy to say that the highlight of my year (quite possibly one of the highlights of my life) is my euro trip. but it's not just the trip that was amazing. it was being with family. with people i haven't seen in years. it's realizing how blessed i am to have such great family who would generously help out just to be with you and would go out of their way to make sure you would have the time of your life...

we went to copenhagen, malmo, berlin and prague. i also saw a little of the amsterdam airport and too much of the berlin, tegel airport. but it was amazing... and it changed me in ways i could never have imagined.

it was definitely a year of change. 2009 was the year when i got the job i've always wanted. a job i take pride in. a job that i don't mind working overtime for, a job that means something to me than just a means to a paycheck. it doesn't pay as much as my old job and it's a lot of work. but i love it and i can't imagine doing anything else.

i gave up my nice apartment in my old hometown to live somewhere close to work and share a condo with a friend. it's been challenging... in so many ways, but the extra time i save from traveling to and from work has been well spent with tascha.

tascha. tascha tascha. where do i even begin? my heart literally melts when she sleeps on my lap. she waits patiently for me, follows me wherever i go and never lets me out of her sight. anything who happily sits by my foot all day can't be bad for me.

what else happened this year? i walked at the edge of a building 125 meters high and saw what a person sees before he plunges off a building. i had my picture taken with e buendia, camped out at the beach with no running water, electricity or bed. (never again.) and ate roasted marshmallows from a raging bonfire by the beach. i tried to learn to play the ukulele and i passed out from drinking too much. i also completed the 9 day "Simbang Gabi" novena mass, heard the christmas and new year masses. and organized all of them. i won a netbook at the christmas party and discovered glee. and i had my very first pair of jimmy choo's.

2009 was also about sealing vaults. i was reacquainted to the eraserheads when i saw their Final Set concert and came to terms that that would be the last time they'll play as a band. you know that nelly furtado song? all good things must come to an end? it was like that. i also saw the nine inch nails "Wave Goodbye" concert. the audio in that concert was kick ass. it was insane. trent reznor is insane. i (heart) him.

in 2009, i learned that you can look at a watch, not see the time, but know that it is time.

oh, and although i got my driver's license, i still can't park.

the (other) year that was.

for as long as i remember, i make a personal year end report every year. except last year. 2008 was eventful. but it was unbelievably sad. i think. and it was sad because i didn't see all the blessings thrown at me. i saw the things i didn't have and not the ones i was blessed with.

for what it's worth... here's a brief recap of the things that happened in 2008:

i went to hongkong and macau with my brother. we went to Disneyland!!! i went to coron, boracay and bohol with my cousins. I also went back to boracay with my friends and got annoyed out of my mind while they flirted with the bartender.

i traveled alone for the first time. I went to ilocos sur and ilocos norte where i had an amazing time. i have to fly back there soon. i said fly because the 16 hour road trip to pagudpud is way too much. and i do love long road trips. just not that long.

i lost the job i've had since 2005 and got a new one at the same company. but by year's end, i realized i wanted something else for me so i started looking for a new job.

I built amazing friendships there. some are still part of my life but some opted out... i believe they have their reasons... and i, of course, understand.

I also met someone who i thought would stick around and I, the fool that i was (still am), was willing to pack my bags and leave everything. I was gearing up to attend comic cons every year. imagine that.

It was also in 2008 when i discovered j johnson, j castro, b dylan and their music. and it was the only year in history when i did my christmas shopping after christmas.

the highlight of 2008, though was getting tascha. my feisty and adorable puppy. in 2008 i wouldn't have said it was the highlight of my year... but tascha has grown to be such an sweet and crazy puppy, you can't help but love her and believe that getting her was one of best decisions one has ever made.

with the way i ended 2008, i had no idea how amazing 2009 would be. everyone predicted that 2009 would be a struggle. i wonder what they meant by that. it was an amazing year for me. and it's not amazing because i got more blessings. it's amazing because i saw the blessings. and loved my life. and i am so glad things changed.

i'm thankful. forever grateful.