summer in october. or not.

I think I need to rest. Not rest like go on an adventure far away. But just rest. Stay at home and not worry about anything. Sleep late. Watch senseless tv. Laugh my head off. Eat like there’s no tomorrow and sleep. Rest with wild abandon. 

I’ve always kinda loved airplanes and… yes, even airports.  Somehow, I felt like it was a gateway to escape; to unknown adventures; to new possibilities.  But I think at a given amount of time you spend in them, you get tired and you just wish you can go home.  I think I got to that point sometime between Tagbilaran and Manila.

I’ve never wanted to be home as much as I did when we were in Cheron island.  After camping in Zambales last year, I swore that once was enough and I would not do that again if I can help it.  When my cousin said that we were going to be the first guests at the island and the facilities will be ok when we get there, I thought, well… maybe there wouldn’t be any curtains; or some windows will be missing; or a faucet or two might not work; or there wouldn’t be any hot water; or maybe there wouldn’t be any water in the pool.

So. imagine my surprise when we got there. First, there was no running water. And there was no air conditioning. There was no running water!!! I was a little brave, and unbelievably exhausted from the early flights, from running around everywhere and the scary and bumpy boat ride to the island.  I didn’t cry myself to sleep this time. And I didn’t even have to drink at all. I guess I’m growing up a little, huh?

The trip was cut short because of bad weather. By bad weather, I mean a super typhoon.  The boat broke while we were negotiating the horrendous waves.  I was already thinking of an escape plan. How was I going to swim to the nearest island and still save my laptop and phone? How many minutes or seconds do I have before sharks smell the blood dripping from me and devour my legs?

Luckily, we didn’t have to swim or try to stay afloat while holding our laptops and cameras over our heads.  We made it to the hotel at the mainland just in time, drenched but alive nonetheless.

The hotel was a welcome balm, knowing that the flight back home is just around the corner.  Or so we all thought.  Everything seemed to be going as planned on our way to the airport.  We were all looking forward to all the comfort Manila would bring, that was until our flight was cancelled. 

I am unbelievably exhausted. I mean, I just feel drained. And I look at myself in the mirror and I can see the exhaustion all over me.  I am just tired, in every way a person can be tired.

I think I need to stay grounded for a while. No more long road trips and flights and adventures for a while. I think I just need to be home. No one in the world needs to go home as much as I do now.